So I don’t tell, I just plug along and write it as God feeds me to do. God will place – I’ve said that and believe that. Keep my path in this honest dear Lord and move me to do as your will. In Christ’ name I pray: effectual fervent prayer. And nobody can take it away.
1/12/19 – I knew then, when I read his letters to us, in start “my darling and children”. I was two months old and my dad went to Iceland to help build the airport. I always thought it was probably a chance to earn good money, kinda’ like the pipelines in Alaska for good paying yet hard work. But it was more. When I read my dad’s letters – 63 years later – I realized it was dire straits to keep his family supported. He was 26 years old. Heartbreaking when you read how lonesome he was and how he missed his young family so desperately. But to pray to hang on for four more months to secure rumor of a $500 bonus and a guaranteed job back home in the states. Working twelve hour days and then no work on some due to storms – so no pay. He wrote of how sick he got but worked on through and assured mom he’d be okay in a couple days (all the while working those 11-12 hour days). My heart breaks to imagine how his world was taken and how he endured what he did for us – his young family. Dad always did that; no matter what he had, it didn’t matter to him if he had it or not, just so we were taken care of. Always he did that.
1/23/19 – And if I write all this down, there’s nothing that can stop. Freedom to do so, right? Compassion to a love so special and so missed, my family: my mom, dad, younger sister and son. And then I visit all my “angel army” in my heart; I miss and love all of them. And the pictures re-hash all the thoughts to the point I am overwhelmed with emotion all day long. So I break from the pictures for just a few. I get excited to see them and re-visit some, yet it wears me out mentally. The whole ordeal wears me out!
I can’t get the years back and I can’t re-live them. But as I age I am blessed to have the letters and the pictures and our family bibles of generations back. I am blessed so I can reflect and hopefully settle in all of this. God has given my heart what it needs, the true treasures of years past. Many steps and many paths my family has made throughout their lives. I am somehow passionate to tell their story. I feel all the work and love endured, need not be reduced by greed and dishonesty. For what is real was in their hearts and there will come a day, perhaps, others can be fed by the love and devotion there and also not there. For some try to take.
I pray as I go forward to tell a story I promised to tell. One which can’t be taken away!
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